new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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