She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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