Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
