he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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