I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize