i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
