So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
