im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
