She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
