So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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