Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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