me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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