so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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