i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
