Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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