Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
