ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
