Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize