margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
