Welp...herpes.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
