soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
True strength comes from lack of pants
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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