there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize