People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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