So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
