you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Randomize
