Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
