Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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