What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
