school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
