opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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