I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
