I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize