Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
