So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Its about making memories worth repressing
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
