What tipped you off? The sombrero?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
