Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
