Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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