last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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