So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
