yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize