found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
even my farts smell like vagina
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
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