Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
