It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
