i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
It's just like the Real World with babies
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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