So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
