I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Randomize
