I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
