I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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