im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
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