dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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