when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
