For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
