Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
