K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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